Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The Vedict's In......I'm a Slacker Mommy

As part of a Mother's Day gift, K's teacher had him fill out a sheet titled, "My mom according to K." As I read it, I came to the realization that K perceives me as a slacker mom and now his teacher knows it.
click to enlarge (notice the exclamation points)
Not only can I not do a black flip, I'm obsessed with cleanliness instead of more important things, take a nap while he's at school, and can't even come up with a pet name to call him. Well at least he didn't disclose all my other weaknesses here and hopefully he keeps my name safe from now on........yeah right when kids say the darnedest things. I don't think teachers should be asking such personal questions any how.

Oh yeah, how do you know what I do when you're at school anyways? Little did you know that I mowed the lawn and weeded while you were there yesterday. You think the lawn mows itself when dad's out of town? And I sat around and let you guys make a mess and didn't make you clean it up. Remember? I spent an hour trying to help L relearn to ride a bike while you and A rode yours too. I was sweating bullets and my back hurt too. I've been a single mom for the last four weeks (minus weekends). I even drove to and from Jackson Hole alone with the three of you and didn't kill us even in the middle of the night with all those freaky deer. humph. Ok fine I admit I frequently do take naps in the afternoon. So what? Did you know there's a study that shows people who take naps have healthier hearts? huh, huh, huh? Didn't think so. Don't you want me to have a healthy heart and live a long life? I guess I'm a little disgruntled which means I probably should get off my behind and be a little more enthusiastic with my motherly duties. Next year, this sheet is going to read:

My mom cannot not do anything.
My mom is the happiest when we are productive, industrious little individuals.
My mom gets mad when.......she never gets mad, even when the house is dirty because she realizes that a clean and perfect house is not as important as spending good quality time with her children.
My mom's pet name for me is busy bee because I'm always working away while my peers waste their time watching t.v. and playing video games.
While I'm at school my mom does all sorts of creative things including crafts, making meals, spending time with my brothers one on one, and taking care of the neighbors.
I love my mom because she's perfect.


Chris said...

Sister Beck's talk comes to mind.

Emily said...

Okay, NOT TO BE MEAN, but seriously that "teacher" asked really lame questions. WHY would you put on a mother's day thing "what makes your mom mad?" Shouldn't we try to concentrate on the good? It almost looks like she was trying to bring out dirt or something.... weird if you ask me. But otherwise, pretty normal answers, I'm sure my boys would say the same things! AND you deserve a NAP for all that cleaning you do! you're an awesome mom! Happy Mother's day!

lucy said...

Just as a clarification, I'm not really disgruntled. Just thought it was funny.

the narrator said...


i think this is a sign that you should learn how to do backflips. what kind of mother are you?

lucy said...

one that doesn't know how to do back flips. last time i tried, i gave my instructor a bloody nose. i can roll over, does that count?